Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Why not?

Why not start blogging a bit again?

My (now ex-) boyfriend and I broke up and moved out of our shared apartment officially this past weekend. Life is changing in a big way once again, so might as well write a bit.

I've been in the DC area for over 3 1/2 years. Moving out of the apartment I shared with Ryan felt like moving out of the first home I had out here. I'd lived in a couple rented rooms before living with him, but nothing had ever been a place of my own. We shared our apartment and we shared his dog and we shared a lot of dreams, and in spite of all that, I broke up with him and forced this big change.

I may come to regret my decision, but I am proud of it for now. I love him, he's done nothing wrong. It's the worst thing to try and explain to another human. I just want something different, something more. As my future roommate Sara says, "I need someone whose dysfunctions complement my own."

So tonight I will sleep on Sara's couch, and I will be both incredibly grateful for her generosity, and pine away for the day in ~2 months when I can pull the little bit I own out of storage and have a bedroom and a home again.

I'm a lucky human, and a sad human, and just human. Here's to another beginning.

Sunday, April 28, 2013

I'm back...

Hello friends, if any of you are still out there.

I'm coming back to my blog after a monstrosity of a hiatus. If you are still here reading, I am ecstatic and I welcome you. If I am writing to myself, so be it.

Tonight's entry shall be short and sweet, and subtitled "Step up or step off."

This year has turned into a year of self-assessment and growth for me, mostly in the realm of self-respect, -integrity, -confidence, and romantic relationships.

Therefore, tonight I am openly stating "I am a take home to mama type of girl (and dad's like me too), so if you aren't interested in taking me home to Mama, step off."

That's all.

I've been surrounded and pitifully woo'ed, if one could call it that, by boys who would like to "hang out." Consequently, tonight I am fervently expressing my need to be taken on a date, respected, doted upon, and taken home to meet the parents.

The End

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Career Ponderings

Hello My Dear Beautiful Friends,

Lately I've been thinking/considering/obsessing over my career track :-)  I find that my future (which follows the track I'm on now) of writing grants and writing papers with a little teaching thrown in is becoming less and less appealing.  I love students, I love mentoring, I love getting to lead, I love having contact with people, and I love feeling like my work has an impact on someone somewhere.  I don't need to change the world in a "I'm the President" sort of way, but I do feel like my abstract, theoretically-based publications read by 13 people aren't fulfilling my soul.  I heard a great quote today about Stephen Covey, who wrote "The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People" and passed away recently.  Tim Robbins wrote that Stephen Covey was a man whose "work was love made visible. " I want to wake up and feel like my work is love made visible.

I spent an hour of my work time yesterday perusing job ads.  I find that I am drawn to applied Public Health positions, but that most of the positions I'm drawn to require several years of experience.  Consequently, I am seriously considering following in Joey Juscius's footsteps into the Public Health Officer world in the military (probably Air Force).  I've done quite a bit of research on it, and the next steps would be to try and find someone to email who is doing the work now and to talk to a recruiter.  It requires a 3-year commitment (drop in the bucket for us grad school chaps) and should come with at least some of my student loans being paid back.  I keep getting really excited about the prospect, but then I feel like maybe I shouldn't be.  I love the idea of getting out from behind a desk and having contact with humans and having some level of responsibility, but then I wonder whether my excitement is based more on leaving the academic world and less about entering the military.

I must admit, though, that I have considered doing something like this at every step in my education.  I talked to a recruiter quite a bit when I was graduating from high school.  I also looked into potential ROTC opportunities at Baker.  Before graduating from NDSU, I found a really cool program through the Army that sent sociologists and psychologists to war zones to help with cultural communication.  I've always believed in serving my country in one way or another.  I know that is weird and a lot of people disagree with it, especially in the more liberal worlds that I float in, but I love the idea.

Anyway, that is where I am right now.  I wanted to share...perhaps get feedback if anybody has it.

Love,
Amber

Sunday, July 1, 2012

Derecho me crazy!

I don't know if my title even makes any sense, but I recently experienced my first (and hopefully only) storm called a derecho.  In Spanish, derecho apparently means some form of "straight."  Consequently, this storm was made of straight line, sustained winds of 70+ miles per hour.

Lucky for me, I was in Roanoke, VA visiting my best friend when the storm moved in.  My best friend maintained power, although a great many other people in SW VA did not.  DC was hit just as hard, or harder.  A couple million people were without power at a time when the thermometer has been hitting 100 degrees during the daytime hours.  The conservative estimate of my power being turned on, both at my apartment and my office, is Friday evening...5 days from now, and 7 days after the initial storm.

Luckily, I fly out for a 4th of July holiday on Wednesday to visit North Dakota.  In the meantime though, I'm infringing upon my best friend.  I now have to decide whether I head back tomorrow or not.  I really don't like sleeping in my apartment with no AC and no fan.

That's the most I've got to share right now!  I'm exceptionally lucky to have such an amazing friend who takes me in without reservations.

Love you all!
Amber

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Here we go again...

Ever wonder how many times you have to be hit with the same board, to the face no less, before you learn? I do. Today I wonder all over again. So we meet again heartache. Well once again, you won't get the best of me.

Night friends. I love you all.